WHY O.J. SIMPSON WAS NOT IN EPISODE II

It has come to the attention of the Galactic Inquizitor that O.J. Simpson was originally selected for the role of Mace Windu in Star Wars Episode 2 : "Attack of The Clones."  

We sent our reporter to interview "The Juice" and get the facts as to what happened.

Mr. Simpson is it true you were selected for the role of Mace Windu before Samuel L. Jackson?

OJ : "That is correct." 

So why do you think you were the first choice?

OJ : "Well it is well known that I am good with a blade.  so those light saber scenes were easy. I did not even need gloves."

"I also have a long career in science fiction.  I expect you saw my great performance in 'Capricorn One?'"

No I missed that.

OJ : "Then there was 'Killer Force.'  That Was before 'A Killing Affair' in 1977."

I'm seeing a pattern.  So you in a way familiar with "The Force."

OJ : Oh, yes.  You could say I'm the true 'dark side.'  Ethnic humor aside, the only 'force' I ever had trouble with was the LA Police force."

 I think we all remember that one.

OJ : "That whole trial thing still haunts me."

You feel guilty?

OJ : "No. It caused me to loose this part.  Very unfair, it was."

Okay Yoda, what happened?

OJ : "I was there on the set with the original cast. Britney Spears was in her Padme outfit, and Justin Timberlake was in his Anakin Skywalker outfit.  I walked up behind then with my saber and said, 'Hi, Nicole and Ron!'  Man did they run.  We never saw them on the set again.  I got fired for a little prank.  No one appreciates a joke anymore.  Actually, I'm a real cut-up."

< OJ grins >

Okay, ...... on that creepy note.  I think we're finished. 

Published on: May 6, 2002
Updated :  May 9, 2002

O.J. Simpson

Mace Windu

Attack Of The
Clones